Good Friday

We have been talking a lot about Jesus all week in preparation for Easter. Eating the food he ate. Finding things in nature that remind us of Jesus and other small activities and stories. Lucy had been sweet, but I was wondering how much was sinking in.

Tonight I told Lucy the story of Jesus' Crucifixion by candlelight to remind us of the hours of darkness that followed Christ's death. Lucy loved it and really got into asking lots of questions.

The we watched the cartoon "He is Risen." When Christ first appeared to Mary in the Garden, I pulled out our Christus (which I wish I had out all the time, but it just didn't seem to work in a kidproof home). Lucy had never seen it before. She asked me "May I please hold him." She was so careful as she hugged him and kissed him and then told me "I love Jesus."

Later when I tucked her in bed I sang "I am a Child of God" while scratching her back, as I always do, but this time she stopped me with lots of questions.

After the first line "I am a Child of God and he has sent me here." She asked me "Why did he send me? Why do we have to be away from him? I miss Heavenly Father and Jesus. I want to talk to them."

Well, that was too many questions all at once, so I only answered the part about talking to them and told her about prayer, which didn't satisfy her.

"No, I want to talk to him real. I want to talk with him. I want to hear him."

I mentioned to her that we would see him again. I told her Jesus would come again. She got sooooo excited!!!

Then she enthusiastically rambled on "When is he coming? Can he come next week? What will we do with him? Is he staying many days? Is he staying a week? Will he stay the night?"

So I answered a lot of "I don't knows" and then she asked me very sincerely:

"I know Jesus is busy. Will he have time to go to Legoland with us? He is coming on Legoland day. I really want to bring him there."

So Sweet. I love how she talks about him like he is her best friend. She is so close to the spirit. Children are truly magical. I am so glad I have had the opportunity to understand why the Savior loved little children so much and always took time to be with them and bless them when he could. I am trying to be more like a child, more like Lucy.

Some words from Lucy

Watching conference with Lucy was really sweet. We didn't make her sit there, she just played in the room while we watched. During Elder Nelson's talk he said "precious boys and girls" immediately after Lucy perked up and said in a little elated voice

"Precious!! I am precious."

I sure wish everyone felt like that! We spend so much time telling ourselves why we aren't of worth and doubting the prophets words when it comes to how precious we are to our Heavenly Father. We should be more like children and exclaim with joy that we know we are precious!

As Elder Nelson continued his talk he also said the word "light" and Lucy repeated "Light. I am light!" I have told her that her name means "light" and that she is a "light" many times. She was so excited.

He then mentioned the song title "I am a Child of God" once again Lucy piped in with her excited spirit "I am a child of God!"

I wonder if my 3 year old felt the spirit stronger during Elder Nelson's talk than most adults. She didn't need to understand every detail, she got the message. We have to spend hours and hours listening to the prophets and apostles trying to absorb the spirit, but I guess she is already a lot closer to the spirit.

This week I have been trying to teach her the importance of Easter. We have been discussing things Jesus did. Tonight I explained how Jesus taught in parables and then shared the parable of the Ten Virgins. After the parable I started to explain that it was about how Jesus will come to Earth again. I told her

"You know how weddings are so exciting? The wedding they are talking about is Jesus coming again."

Lucy got a really excited look on her face because she loves weddings and the topic of marriage. Then she pointed to Jesus in the picture of the second coming and said "Look Mom, it is a wedding because Jesus is wearing white, just like a married girl. And he has long hair like one too!!!" Then she exclaimed "I love Jesus!" and started kissing the picture.

Okay, that wasn't exactly what I meant about Jesus' coming being like a wedding, but I am sure the Lord has a sense of humor!

What Language do babies speak?

The other day Levi was babbling. I asked Lucy "What is Levi trying to say?"



She answered in a matter of fact voice, "I don't know...he is speaking spanish."



Wow! What a smart baby I have!





Today on the way home from church Lucy started making a big fuss "Why did you put that in my face?!!" She asked angrily.



Both Dave and I answered in unison, "What did we put in your face?"



"The sun" she declared, and we laughed and then explained that the sun did what it wanted to.





I'll be honest...the other day I got mad at Lucy. She went in to Levi's room while he was sleeping and blew the recorder in his ear.

She started crying when I got mad at her and then said through her tears "You need to be nice. Why are you listening to Satan?"

Serious blow to me. Of course, I started crying and apologized. Then she came and hugged me and looked up at me through her tears and said sincerely "It's okay Mommy. I still love you."

What if everyone could be so forgiving instead of holding such grudges. I think this is what the scriptures mean when they say to be like a little child (as opposed to running around screaming and destroying the entire house in 5 minutes).

I am so thankful for the life and atonement of Jesus Christ, especially so that I can be forgiven, after getting mad at such a sweet little girl.

Smiles!!!

I finally caught some good smiles on camera yesterday. I got some on video a few weeks ago, but haven't really tried that hard with the still camera because the lighting isn't very good at our house and I don't stalk Levi with the camera like I did with Lucy...ha ha!

He sure is a smiley guy! He started smiling at 3 weeks and I'm not talking one measley smile. He was smiling all the time, right up at you. Now he smiles and babbles with you. I think he will be quite a social guy, although he is very independent. Sometimes he starts crying because he wants to be put down. Lucy never did this and it has come as quite a shock. I got in the habit of carrying Lucy everywhere, because she pretty much cried if I put her down. Levi just gets annoyed because I tend to carry him, then he stops fussing when he can wiggle on the ground. Wow! That's cool!


Lucy thinks it is hilarious to take pictures with her tongue sticking out. I guess Levi does too!



Yesterday I was struggling to get Lucy to take a nap. I finally said "Where do you want to sleep?" She answered "Right here" then I responded "Okay, then lay down" and she did! I was laying down on the bed and the next thing I knew I woke up an hour and a half later and she was asleep on the ground. She is always full of surprises!


Lucy Moment: At church on Sunday the topic in Sacrament meeting was Reverence. I was asking Lucy about it and then reminded her that while we fold our arms we also think of Jesus. Then I asked her "What are you thinking about Jesus?"

She answered "I think I will share my toys with him. Where is he? I don't see him." As she looked around the congregation for him.

Now that is true devotion right there! Hey, sharing toys is big in the life of a three year old! I love her!

I am a Child of God

On May 23, Lucy, My Dad and I sang at Church. It was a really special experience.

I was asked to sing a few weeks before and was having a hard time deciding what to sing. I had started singing "I am a Child of God" to Lucy before bed each night. I had only done it for about a week, when I observed her playing and singing the song. I was amazed that she sang the whole song through, having never heard her sing it before. It then hit me that there was nothing more spirit filled than a child singing. Since the goal of singing at church is to invite the spirit, I thought the best thing I could do was have her sing with me. Building upon the idea I invited my Dad to sing with us. That way it would really relay the message that we are all Children of God, young and old alike.

It was the sweetest experience. I was worried because in practice she would rush through it and give me attitude about singing it more than once, but in the real performance she sang it slowly and very heartfelt. She stuttered a little at the beginning, I think seeing all the people took her back, but then she regained her confidence and remembered all the words. When she finished the first verse, she launched right into "Jesus Wants me for a Sunbeam" which got a lot of laughs! It was really sweet. Then she tried to upstage me and grabbed the microphone when I was singing the second verse. It was a little comical, but still really invited the spirit. I really wish we had a video, but we decided against breaking rules and hiding the camera while we were trying to bring the spirit.

Anyway, what a special experience I will never forget. Lucy is so full of the spirit. I am so blessed to be her Mom and spend so much time with such a wonderful Child of God.

Lucy Prayers and Scriptures

I am so blessed to have such a sweet daughter. She brought me to tears during her prayer tonight.

It started by getting home late. We arrived around ten and then I wanted to wash my feet before bed because we had been at the beach earlier. Lucy (my little shadow) came in wanting to wash her feet too. Then she started getting mad because she wanted to sit where I was sitting while she washed them. She started bossing me around telling me to move and I said "No, I want to sit here." I tried to move her to the other side of me so she could reach the water better, but that just sent her into a tantrum. She started screaming and crying, so I finished washing my feet and started brushing my teeth.

She cried and cried until we got in bed and then she started to calm down. We talked about what had happened and how I didn't like it when she yelled at me to do things. She sobbed that she was sorry for yelling at me to move and tried to explain why she wanted to sit there (which I still don't understand, but she definitely had a reason).

We got in bed and then Lucy started crying again with a worried tone "We didn't read scriptures. We have to read scriptures scriptures." Although she was very tired, I couldn't deny such a sweet request.

Lucy offered the prayer. She started off in a calm collected voice "Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for this day. Thank you for scriptures." And then just totally broke down sobbing all of a sudden "Please... help Lucy... feel... better and not... yell at... mommy."

Before she had closed the prayer we were both sobbing, although I was trying to hide it from her so she wouldn't ask me "Why" and then I would have to explain tears of love to her. She just wants so much to be good and do what I ask her and sometimes she is just to tired and emotions get the best of her. I have helped her to pray and ask forgiveness over things a few times before, but this time she felt serious sadness over being mean and she prayed about it all on her own.

I am so lucky to be with her every day. I am beginning to truly understand why the Savior taught us to be like a little child. She is so teachable and so forgiving of other's mistakes. Here she is thinking the whole thing was her fault, when it wasn't as if I was being really patient, plus I kept her up past the hour of reasoning ability.

Anyway, we read scriptures and Dave sneaked out to take a shower. It really upset Lucy once she noticed he was gone and she wanted to wait until he was there to continue. We only started reading scriptures as a family about 2 months ago, but it has certainly become a huge part of her life. She loves reading the stories and makes sure we read them every night. I love it when she talks about "Lamey" and "Lemul" because they are kind of "lamey." She always asks why the lamanites are being mean and why they are fighting (and "why" about every other picture). When people do mean things she has started talking about Jesus and how they aren't making him happy, which I don't remember explaining to her, but maybe she learned it in Nursery. She is definitely not going to let us off the straight and narrow path anytime soon.

Speaking at Girl's Camp with Lucy

July 14

I absolutely adored Girl's Camp while I was growing up. It always inspired me to become something great. I wanted to inspire girls like I had been at girls camp and sometime around the age of a Laurel, I made a goal to be a Girl's Camp Speaker...someday in the far away future. Well, I am happy to announce that "someday" came true. My Mom was called to be the Stake Girl's Camp Director this year, so after subtly mentioning that I could speak if she wanted me to, and then continuing to hint for months, my Mom finally asked me to speak at Girl's camp.

I was thrilled. The theme for their camp was "The Hero Within" and was all about Superhero's. My talk was entitled "The Faith to Fly." I dressed like a "Super Sister" and spoke about Faith and that it implies action, not just a belief and that all superhero's have it. I even ventured to say that anything extraordinary that has ever come to be, started with Faith; someone who believed in something and acted on those beliefs. I told the story about the Wright Brothers and their dream to make an airplane fly and how they achieved their dream with Faith. I told about Spiderman and his first attempts to climb up walls and swing from his web and how he used Faith.

To illustrate how important the action part of Faith is, I told the story of Nephi and explained that he didn't just say "The Lord will provide a way," and then sit around and wait for the plates to land in his lap. He moved his feet. He went to Jerusalem. He did all he could and then the Lord provided a way. The Lord will provide a way for us to use our individual talents and strengths to promote the Gospel, if we are taking action and striving to. Prayer and Scripture study, supported with courage to take action about what you know is right is how we exercise our Faith. With Faith in the Lord, He can make our weaknesses turn into strengths, and our Strengths turn into Superpowers. I even pulled out some of my pre-baby gymnastics moves to illustrate the Faith I demonstrated when learning to perform an Ariel. It left me very sore for days to come, but I have never been able to resist showing off (as you probably know if you regularly read my blog!).

Overall, what I learned in my heart was that it takes Faith to be a disciple of Christ. It is good to believe, but we must go beyond just believing or our beliefs will dwindle. Believing is just a step to gaining Faith. If you don't first have belief you will never gain Faith, but if you want a strong testimony and to be a tool in the Lord's hand, you have to take action, and by doing so, you will be blessed with more Faith. You can't just believe in Christ from afar. You must follow his example and do as he did. Remember to do those simple things that we learn in primary. Faith is not a noun, it's a verb! We don't just have faith, we exercise it! Faith is a muscle that grows when we use it. If you want more, use whatever amount you have to do something and you will be given more. I always thought that Faith was just believing in things we don't see. Now I realize it is precisely that, when we add "and acting according to those beliefs." Speakers always learn more than those being spoken to. I hope the spirit was able to touch a few hearts out there, even if it was only a fraction of the way the Lord touched me.

I stayed the night and brought Lucy with me. Dave was in Utah and we all know I have separation anxiety, so you do what you have to. We squished onto a small cot on the bottom of a bunk. I forgot to bring a sleeping bag or pillow. I guess I was thinking about my talk too much and just rushed out the door, plus we usually camped in tents and so I didn't think about needing bedding, knowing that we would be in cabins. Luckily, someone brought an extra sleeping bag (Melanie, bless your heart for following that prompting!), and my sweatshirt sufficed for a pillow. We endured to the end, and enjoyed the fruits of our labor the next day!

July 15

We spent the next day canoeing, feeding the ducks and swimming at the pool. Lucy had a ball!
I didn't think we would get to go canoeing, since it was for the girls, but Lucy kept asking the guy in charge "boat please," so he invited us to go after all the girls had a turn. We were both thrilled!

Here are some shots of Lucy's first canoe experience:





There was also a Mommy duck and her babies at the lake, and Lucy couldn't resist wading with them.



Someone offered Lucy some bread to feed them and I got a sweet picture of the bread in motion!


And Salute! Looks like a little gymnast after a great performance in this shot!

Yay for Girl's Camp! We had sooooo much fun and were so blessed to go embark in the spirit of the Lord and the spirit of young girls! Oh, and the Director couldn't have been any better!
(Good Job! I love you Mom!)

Becoming Childlike

While hiking at Arches National Park, Dave was worried about Lucy on a steep a slippery part. He asked Lucy to hold his hand and explained that it was dangerous and she might fall down.

Lucy replied to the warning: "Mommy Catch You. Mommy catch you" with a very "duh, daddy" sort of tone. I thought this was a little funny, because she fell down many times on the hikes we took and I only caught her about 50% of the time (I am trying really hard not to be a "hover mother" theses days). I wish I didn't ever have to watch her fall down, but I am grateful she still has such confidence in me.

I believe this is part of what is meant in the scriptures about becoming like a little child. We need to have unwavering, child like confidence in our Heavenly Father's ability to catch us. Although sometimes we may feel like we are falling down, he is always there to catch us if we will let him. We must trust him. Trust in him, and the atonement, just like a child trusts that Mommy and Daddy will be there to catch them. Thankfully, our Heavenly Father has a much better accuracy rate than I do!

Things Lucy Says and other deep Wendy realizations

I have great news for those of you who are curious or who have toddlers that use profanity, I haven't heard Lucy use the f-word in about a month and a half, and even Heidi came to visit last week (because Heidi couldn't refrain from laughing, Lucy used to yell it at her over and over just to make her laugh). Hallelujah!

I told Lucy that "Daddy gave Mommy my ring at the temple and we got married" a while ago. Now whenever we pass a temple Lucy recalls "Daddy Mommy ring temple married!" and then while pointing at the angel Moroni she exclaims "Careful Guy" " Ball" "Fall Down" "Careful." She came up with that all on her own and it cracks me up! I guess she doesn't realize that angels can fly yet!

She says her own prays which are a bunch of babbling and then "amen." It makes my heart melt every day.

"her ago mama" when she gives you things "for here you go mama." It doesn't really matter what she gives you, you can't help but smile when she says that to you.

"pease" for "please,"

"I do it!" at least 30 times a day. In fact, last week she opened the car door, climbed into her carseat and buckled herself completely in, all on account of that phrase. Today she hiked at least 75 % of our hike to Stewart Falls and back (about a 4 hour hike with Lucy) while I carried the empty baby back pack.

"Mama's toy" when I told her the computer was not a toy (one of my new recent phrases for "you can't play with that")she pointed at it and questioned "Mama's toy?" It caught me pretty off guard. I finally said "yes, you are right. It's Mama's toy." Kind of makes you think a little bit about how much you are using the computer, huh?

"Hold non" instead of "Hold on" she says this all the time. Anytime you can possibly hold on to anything.

"I get ana pillow" for "I will get my pillow" We just got a her a Belle pillowcase and she won't go upstairs without it.

"Luff you" for "Love you." Now the days are all blurring and I can't remember if she said that for the first time yesterday or 2 days ago. The day before she said it for reals she faked me out by saying "Luff you Mama" I started rejoicing and then realized she was pointing at her "Mama, do you love me?" book. I was crushed. I thought that was her first spontaneous "I love you Mama," but it didn't take long. The next day when she said bye to me she also included "Luff you" without any prompting (she has been saying "Luff you" for a while, but only when we ask her to).

Yesterday she even said "Bye Swing. Luff You" which she most definitely does. We put her on the big kid swing these days and she says "High. Fast" and "und dawg" for underdog. If she is not being pushed way too high for me to feel okay about it, she is upset. But I will be the first to admit I encourage her adventurous spirit despite being worried about her sometimes. I really don't want her to be a fearful and worried child. I want her to enjoy life, even if it means she gets hurt sometimes. I finally figured out that kids get hurt all the time and that they are resilient if you let them be.

Dave just taught Lucy after she gets hurt to brush her hands, brush her knees, then shake it off and give a triumphant sigh. It has worked wonders (we are talking magic here people) and I feel great that we are teaching her to be strong and have a great attitude towards life. I want her to realize that sometimes hard things happen, but you just pick yourself up and then keep enjoying. My testimony has really grown lately that it is through pain we learn. When we have hard times, we learn things and we grow. When I find myself struggling, I have been trying to think "What can I learn from this?" I almost feel like as soon as you really get the message and grow, all of a sudden your trial is either gone, or you at least start to see some solutions. Sometimes you just have to have a little headache to appreciate how awesome your body is when it is functioning at full speed. (I had a headache last night and I seriously can't stop thinking how great I feel right now without one).

To demonstrate this principle on a much bigger note, let me recap an experience. Last Fall, I had been praying to be happy again. I felt like I used to be happy, but between sleep deprivation and adjusting to 24 hour Momhood I just couldn't get back on track. I knew that your attitude was entirely up to you and I kept thinking "okay, today I will be happy" but then I would feel so tired from lack of sleep and after taking Lucy to the park, reading her books, making her food, and cleaning, all I wanted to do was sleep and my good attitude would fade as I continued to try and take care of Lucy until bedtime. I finally decided with everything that I could muster, that I would force happiness and then, Lo and Behold, Lucy was hospitalized due to food poisoning (all this was taking place in South Korea). She didn't keep down any food for over a month. At first I was so upset that my whole happy attitude didn't work. I thought to myself "Look where trying to be happy got me? Huge trials. Lots of Misery! I should have never asked to be happy. At least it wasn't this bad" I felt so angry and so helpless to control any part of my life. But you know what actually happened looking back, I enjoy my days with Lucy so much more now. I am so thankful that she is alive and healthy and that she can eat and we can go anywhere we want. We can dance together and swing together and run together. Whenever I am having a bad day and Lucy skips her nap and I don't get "me time" and I am tempted to just being annoyed with my circumstances, I think back to that experience and I know that my day is absolutely and completely awesome compared to being stuck in a hospital with a suffering daughter. I start to feel grateful that she actually has the ability to go without a nap, rather than be so sick that she sleeps most of the day and night. And when I am tired, at least I get to lie down on a big comfy bed, instead of sharing a hospital cot with Lucy while trying to avoid laying on the IV tube. I have suddenly realized how it is possible to be grateful for your trials (I used to think the people who talked about being grateful for their trials were kind of nutty, but I really am one of those nuts now). Trials can wake you up. They can make you grateful. They can change your life for the better. They can actually give you exactly what you wanted. I wanted to be happy and the Lord answered my prayers. I didn't realize that my answer would actually come in the form of a trial. Sometimes your prayers can't be answered overnight. Sometimes it takes a change of heart and some new stretch you experiences to have what we want. I am happy now and I know that Heavenly Father hears and answers our prayers, although they may be in mysterious and difficult to understand ways. You could say "be careful what you pray for," but really as much as we try to avoid trials, how much more awesome are all of us because of the trials we have had to face. I mean if we had never had any trials, we would be as helpless and dependent as a baby. As much as we love babies, I am sure most of us are glad that we don't have a big overgrown body with the mental capabilities of a baby. The reason we aren't babies is because when were babies we had trials and we grew. We pushed ourselves to crawl so that we could reach something that we wanted. And we still face trials as we reach for the things that we want and hopefully we grow. If we don't grow, its just a miserable downward spiral that is probablly more painful than the challenges we face as we strive to become something great. Anyway, these are my latest insights on life. I didn't intend to write a novel about my experiences, this started as a post about Lucy. I guess I will have to go add a little bit to the title now. I must have had a lot more in my heart than I realized when I started typing. I better go before I start wishing trials on everyone and you all end up hating me!

Sweet Moment

The other night at dinner Lucy started squawking when it was time to pray. I was startled by her unusual behavior. Usually prayer time is one of her favorite things. After observing the situation for a moment, I realized that she really wanted her puppy who was nearby on the floor.

"Okay, whatever" I thought "I guess it's not really a big deal if she holds her puppy while we pray." I handed her the puppy.

I then watched a very sweet and tender moment as Lucy folded the puppy's arms and then bowed her own head in preparation for the prayer. After the prayer she opened the puppy's arms up wide the way she always does when we say Amen.

What a very sweet and tender moment. This moment led me to a little pondering:

Little children have the spirit with them so strongly. Can you imagine how wonderful it would be if we were all able to share our testimony of the gospel with others as easily as Lucy showed her puppy how to pray. It is so easy, yet so hard. We worry so much about what others will think. Maybe this is part of what it means to "be like a little child." Don't make easy things harder than they are, don't worry about what everybody thinks, just do it!

I am very thankful for my little missionary, even if right now all she can do is teach pretend puppies. I am so thankful I had the patience at this particular moment to give her the puppy instead of making her wait until after the prayer like I was tempted to do. I would have missed a sweet scene and she would have been frustrated that the puppy didn't get to pray.

It is hard to know what upsets a toddler sometimes, but let us always remember they are filled with the light of Christ. They want to do good, but they are learning and thinking about so many things at one time, sometimes they just can't keep it all together. The more I get to spend time with Lucy in my life the more certain I become that if we watch and listen closely to the little children in our lives, they will remind us of the things that really matter while we are here on this Earth.

Touching Scenes from Every Day Life

Guess where I am posting from right now? Okay, stop guessing already because you never will! I am in Portland staying the night in a swankified (in other words "cheapest one we could find") hotel. To be honest, it was kind of a long day, but it was strangely not that bad. I only cried once, and it wasn't even because of the long miserable sequence of events that transpired (don't worry, I'll tell the details, but I got to build up to it!). Actually, a few minutes ago I was wondering why it wasn't that bad and then I realized it wasn't because my somewhat moody disposition had become suddenly unconquerably optimistic, it was because of Lucy. She was the most optimistic 15 month old there ever was today! She was sooooooo good I can't even explain it! Sure she had her fidgety moments like when she wouldn't stop kicking the seat in front of us on the airplane (sorry to the guy sitting in front of us whoever you are. I tried!), but she was mostly all giggles and sweetness. For waking up at 5:00 a.m. and only taking one 45 minute nap in my arms the entire day, she was the happiest kid you could ever imagine all day. She was stealing glances and sweet smiles from over half the people in the airport because she was running around and skipping and then would get this little bashful look on her face and say, "hi." She kept me smiling all day. One kind man complimented me on my Mom skills (basically he just said he had been watching me and Lucy and could tell I was a good mother and I totally let it get to my head!) and I couldn't fully explain to him that I wasn't always this composed during trying times, and I sometimes get quite frustrated when chasing my little angel around, but Lucy was being as good as she possibly could.

So enough build up already, I will give you the story now that you are completely sucked in! We were supposed to leave for Spokane from San Diego this morning at 6:45 a.m. We barely missed our flight. We weren't that late, but the check in line was unbelievably long. It wound around the entire airport! Too long for my "cut it close" style and so now I guess we will have to go overly early for the rest of our lives, like Dave always wanted to do in the first place. We ended up hanging for a while and then flying standby to Portland, where we tried to fly standby to Spokane, but all the flights were cancelled due to the most humongous storm ever! To make a long story short (and those of you who have kids totally know this really was the short story... 10 hours in an airport or on an airplane with kids is just, well, a long story) hopefully we will be in Spokane sooner than later!

In the midst of my airport wanderings I witnessed a very touching scene that, as I mentioned earlier, brought me to tears. I don't know if it will have the same affect on you, but I thought it was worth sharing with all of you. While in line at the women's restroom, the lady ahead of me exclaimed under her breath to me "Is that a man in the women's restroom? He shouldn't be in here." I looked up to find that her statement was true, but it was completely different than what I expected to find. A sweet, feeble old man was helping his very disabled wife from her wheelchair into the handicapped stall. I responded to the women in line "Oh, well it looks like he is helping someone, so I am sure it's okay." She rudely answered "I don't think he should be doing that. I am sure they could have found someone to assist her. That is just wrong." I stumbled over my words and never really answered her, which is my common response when I feel strongly about something that involves my emotions. I wanted to say something to her, whether it be "Hey lady, lay off" or " well I hope my husband would care enough about me and not what other people think, to do the same thing for me someday." I wouldn't want to ask random airport people to help me go to the bathroom. He was old and feeble and rested in her wheelchair while she used the restroom. What a touching scene. I know some people might think it was wrong like the lady I talked to, but I felt like it was very chivalrous to put your wife above all else. I came out of the bathroom in tears thinking about how sweet that man was. I wanted to say something to him, to compliment him somehow, but that would have been kind of awkward. I was crying because of his sweetness, but also because of how judgmental some people can be. I just didn't understand how anyone could accuse such an act of kindness (that is a little hypocritical... I am judging someone for being judgmental, ha ha). I laughed at myself as tears gushed down my cheeks while trying to explain to Dave that I was crying because there was a Man in the Restroom. Anyway, I guess the moral is that it is all in your perspective. Everyday occurrences can be beautiful eye opening experiences and long airport journey's can be somewhat enjoyable. All we really have is the moment we are living, so why waste it being miserable when things don't go as planned or criticizing people for things that really don't matter or affect us at all? There is beauty all around... in the faces we see every morning and those we only see for one fleeting moment our entire life. There is a story behind every face you meet and rest assured that if you knew that story you would love them, so why not love them anyway?

I am in no way saying I am perfect or have this down (as I just mentioned, come on I judge people for judging for crying out loud!), but for today at least, this is the message ringing in my heart. Let us Love one Another this Christmas season as our gift to humankind in honor of Christ's birth. As we are so often asked the question at Christmas time "What do you want for Christmas?" let us Love one Another, which is surely how Christ would respond to this timeless question.

My Very Own Angel

Sunday we went to the English branch in Seoul so that I could get a little something out of church (I feel the spirit at the Korean ward and love the members, but I guess I just don't have the gift of tongues quite yet!). It took us about an hour and a half both ways to get there. I thought we were awesome for traveling that far by subway, especially with a little one. Okay, more than awesome, I thought we were pretty much close to pioneer status, but just as I began wallowing in my pride, the branch president asked us how long it took us to get there. We answered "An hour and a half" and he replied "Oh good, I thought it would take longer from where you live" and then explained that half of the ward travels that far and one man travels three hours both ways (don't worry, they gave him the gospel doctrine calling so he can prepare and have something to do along the way). So never be prideful, never complain, and go to church no matter how far away it is. But this isn't the point of my post. Really the point of this post is to tell a sweet story about Lucy. (who is just waking up from a nap at 8:30 p.m....yes I know...regular sleep times are good for children, but do you know how hard it is to put Lucy to sleep at the same time every day? When she is tired she is tired and if you don't put her down she is a crank, so if it is 7:00 p.m. and you see tiredness cues you just put her down for a nap. So I'll be right back).

(Okay I'm back and Lucy is sitting beside me busily eating her peaches and rice. I thought I might be able to get her back to sleep for the night, but just as she closed her eyes and was nodding back off she surprised me with wide open eyes and a beautiful chorus of "lener lener lener," that noise where they stick there tongue in and out. Totally Cute! Oh well, now I don't have to await Dave's arrival all by my lonesome. Lucy is absolutely thrilled because I just gave her the spoon and let her go to town which only happens when we are not about to go somewhere or already out somewhere (which is surprisingly very rare). I'm all for messes, but timing is key and if you let them make a huge mess of themselves before you leave you'll never get out the door).

Well, half way through church Lucy really needed a nap, so I found a quiet room to try to rock her to sleep. Just as she nodded off, some loud people came by and woke her up, but now I am grateful she did. She saw a picture of Jesus with the children on the door and started signing "come to me" so I brought her close and explained that it was Jesus (The picture to the right is the picture we saw). She looked mesmerized. Then I told her that Jesus loved the little children in the picture and he also loved her and so she gave him a kiss. I smiled and told her good job, so she just kept wanting to kiss the picture of Jesus. Oh, it melted my heart. It was as if she could hear Christ's plea, "suffer the children to come to me." I hope she always knows she is a precious child of God and just how very very loved she is. Little children definitely enter this world with the Light of Christ and a heart full of love. Just when I start to think it's my mission in life to take care of this little girl, I realize she was really sent here to take care of me. She takes care of my spirit and my testimony and reminds me of what is really important in life. She is the light of my life. My very own little angel to dance with, and laugh with and hold and kiss and snuggle and love. So far in my life there is no experience with a higher reward than to be a Mother. And so although it cost time and money to get to church this Sunday, the experience was priceless.

A Korean Birthday Party

Last night was the funnest birthday party I have ever been to. Our church ward threw Lucy and the Bishop's son a birthday bash to remember. There were at least 50 people there, including the stake president, Dave's Boss, one of my Mom friends from the park, 3 teachers from David's school, some investigators we have become friends with, the missionaries, and half of our church ward!(I wish I had taken a picture of all of our guests!) I couldn't believe everyone came! I was thrilled! After the best dinner I have ever had in Korea (I couldn't believe how much delicious food there was!), they sang Happy Birthday in Korean and English. Then Lucy got to participate in a Korean tradition where the Birthday Child chooses from among many objects to see what her future will be. Lucy chose a pen and school books which meant she would excel in school and win the Nobel Prize. Her second choice was a business pen with money, which meant she would make lots of money, take care of her parents with it (yes!) and be generous to everyone. I am not complaining! The birthday boy (I can't remember his name except translated to English I know it means "King's Key" so I usually call him "Little King") chose first a ping pong racket which meant he will be in the Olympics, and then he chose a spatula which meant he would cook for his wife and be an amazing husband. This was such a fun activity! I think I will include this activity into our family traditions on a child's first birthday. Next, each of the fathers gave a speech about their child, which means, without any planning Dave got up and gave a speech in Korean. He says it was terrible, but I was impressed (not knowing what he said of course)! The cake was good and the members were very excited we brought some friends. Later the guests we brought said they felt very welcome, so I think this was a great introduction to our church.

I am anxious to do missionary work because I love the gospel and know how much happiness it has brought me, but I never want to seem overwhelming and scare people away. I worry that because I just came from a predominately Mormon area (Provo, Utah) now that there are millions of non-members around me, I might frighten people away with my enthusiasm for missionary work! There are so many wonderful people in this world, many of which attend other church's with good inspirational messages. I am getting to know the hearts of many people and I want them to experience the same joy and constant companionship of the spirit that the gospel brings. And thus my current favorite quotation, from President Hinckley:

“We recognize the good in all people. We recognize the good in all churches, in their efforts to improve mankind and to teach principles that lead to good, stable, productive living. To people everywhere we simply say, ‘You bring with you all the good that you have, and let us add to it. That is the principle on which we work’ ”

I guess at this point the best thing to do is just let everyone know that I believe it true, I know it will bring them joy and would love to share it with them. Invite them to ask questions, and let them know they are always welcome to attend with us. After that, it is a combination of their readiness and the spirit, so I will try not to be pushy!

SURPRISE PARTY!!!!!!

On Lucy's Birthday I was a little sad. I knew we were going to be throwing her a party on Saturday(today), but we hadn't done anything special to celebrate her on her birthday. I didn't want anything huge, just maybe a Happy Birthday song and a tender moment with David and Lucy reflecting on the wonderful year we have had with her. You know, something mushy only a Mom would enjoy! It was such a busy day, we didn't even have time to go buy her the toy we were planning to get her. We had to go to the immigration office with Dave's boss in the morning (which was sad because they said I could not get a working visa to do private tutoring, and if I did any private English tutoring it would be illegal) and then after a quick lunch, David left in a hurry for work and usually doesn't get home until after Lucy is asleep. I sat there alone with Lucy, wondering what I could do to make it special and really just feeling depressed over what a busy and boring day it was, filled with sad news. After about 10 minutes, I decided there was just no use being sad, said a humble prayer that I would be able to have a good attitude, and started thinking. After Lucy's nap, I went to go visit a friend I had recently made at the park. After a good visit, I was surprised by a call from Dave. It was only 8:00 p.m. and I was expecting him home around 10:00 p.m. "Where are you?" he asked, "I just got home to surprise you and you're not here!" Turns out, his last class, which is only 2 students (who happen to be the boss's children) had dentist appointments, so Dave was let off early for the first time ever! A coincidence that it happened to be on our daughter's birthday? I think not! The Lord is definitely working a lot of small miracles everyday for all of his children.

Soooo...quick let's plan a party! We biked to our favorite grocery store and bought Lucy her very own Pororo Push Toy! (Pororo is a famous Korean cartoon penguin) It was actually a gift from her Nana and Papa who gave us the money for it. (Thank you sooooooo much!) We strapped it to my back with a bunjee cord, so between that and the skirt I was wearing (yeah, I don't know what possessed me to wear a skirt on our bike ride) I looked pretty ridiculous (I really wanted a picture to capture the ridiculousness, but the camera was in the backpack under all of our groceries and after weighing the pros and cons, I decided against it). Anything for Lucy. I put a little cake together with our favorite Korean dessert, pronounced "duck" in Korean, which is sweet rice, mashed up into a sticky treat with different powders and beans on top or inside. We sang Happy Birthday right on the dot of her Birth time (7:53 a.m. September 4th in America, 10:53 p.m. September 4th in Korea). It was totally mushy, so I guess I got my wish! We let Lucy go for the cake, because duh, it's her birthday! Then we gave her the push toy and let her play for a little while (yes, we let her play at 11:00 p.m.). Our sweet little birthday girl loved it so much, but was so tired she would play with it and then lay down on the ground for a minute, get back up and play more. This was the first time I had a hard time taking her to bed because she was so involved in doing something. She seems older already, with her own set of distinct wants! It turned out to be a really special moment I will always remember. I love how situations in this life can change so quickly with a little prayer and a good attitude!Here is a picture of Lucy's "Duck" Cake
I love the expression on her face. It seems to say "It's my first birthday and this is all you could come up with?"She ended up liking it after allPushing her new push toy

As you can tell by that "Fall in Love with me" Lucy grin, she had a pretty fun night to say the least!

4th of July to Remember

I reached into the back of all my memories to compare and decided this was definitely the best 4th of July I have ever had. It was packed with fun and family, and what could be better than those two? I will give you a quick rundown and slideshow of our day from dawn to dusk!



I woke up early! Whoa! 5:45 a.m. early and was so excited I couldn't sleep. I read for a while and then got ready for the day, which might not seem so amazing to everyone, but the fact that Lucy outslept me by two hours was actually much more than amazing, it was a miracle. Starting the day with a book, shower and breakfast baby free is definitely a moment of bliss for a mother!

We booked it to get to the Parade on time and glory in our highly prized seats that David won (in the shade, might I add!) See the previous post for details on how he won the seats. Usually we get to the Parade in time to see the last 10 minutes, so being there for the full thing was really exciting and really got me in the spirit to celebrate our country! Lucy loved it! She watched intently and clapped every few minutes. It is so fun to share experiences with her and watch her take them in!

After the parade Lani, Sierra and Heidi took a trip to Wal Mart to deck themselves in Hannah Montana attire, while Dave and I relaxed, read, and chatted with my Mom, while Lucy took and extremely long 3 hour nap. Oh, what heaven! We ate good food and got ready for the show, complete with our Holiday Lucy Photo Shoot tradition and then started walking to the Stadium for the main event: STADIUM OF FIRE!!!

The show was amazing! Glen Beck gave a very inspirational talk about what it means to be an American, while Skydivers from all of the armed forces Skdived into the Stadium. Then the Stadium of Fire dancers put on a good show. Blue Man Group performed which was very enjoyable! They were really funny and unlike any musical group I have ever heard before. Of course Miley Cyrus sang (I actually wasn't that impressed. She only sang Miley Cyrus songs, not her Hannah Montana songs which are way better!), and then we watched the best fireworks we have ever seen! Lucy clapped all through the concert, she loves when we watch something and people clap because she knows what to do. I would rather bring her along to stuff than get a babysitter just because it is so fun watching her get excited and clapping! We were so close ash was falling on us! Lucy was really pretty good. She squawked a little toward the end of Miley and was getting really tired, but settled down and was excited as ever for the fireworks. Actually she was having a hard time at first because I was trying to cover her ears. She was really mad and wiggling all over the place. I finally stopped trying to cover her ears and she was completely happy watching the fireworks, loud booming and all! My favorite part of the whole day was watching her point up at the Fireworks, wondering what they were and why we were celebrating instead of sleeping. She was really in awe. Someday, Lucy, you'll understand why we are so excited on this day and why your life is the wonderful life it is because of our forefathers courage!

She just watched and wondered until a piece of ash got in her eye. We were all getting a little stuff in our eyes. I had to take her to the bathroom and wash her eye out, so I missed the finale, but it was such a great day I didn't care. In my hurry to get Lucy taken care of, I didn't bring my cell phone and then when we came out of the restroom the whole stadium was trying to get out, so i didn't know how I was going to find David. I went back to our seats, but David was gone. I wasn't really panicked because we don't live that far away and we would have met up eventually, but Dave had the stroller check ticket and Lucy is 22 lbs that I didn't really want to lug up the hill, in the dark, at 11:00 p.m. I decided I would go to the stroller check and look for him there. Meanwhile, I prayed. I asked very specifically if Heavenly Father would please let David know I was going to the stroller check. When I finished my prayer I felt confident I would find David there. I felt so confident I almost wasn't surprised when he came right up to me at the stroller check. I asked how he knew to meet me here and he just said "It was the only place I could think of." I love those small moments the Lord completely answers your prayers and you just know every minute of your life is being guided and watched over carefully.

We topped off the night splurging with some ice cream cake decorated with strawberries and blueberries to look like a flag by my fabulous cake decorating sister, Heidi. And, even more excitingly, I got to eat it because I timed it so that I was introducing dairy into Lucy's diet the last couple days! It was really really good, but Lucy did have a reaction to dairy so it might be the last scrumptious treat I eat in a while (speaking of my crazy diet, I have lost 10 pounds, in the last 2 months because of it! I don't really know if that is something to brag about or not! It is kind of like "yeah I look good, but can't eat normally and probably should not be losing weight so quickly.")

Anyway, thanks for letting me share this exciting Independence Day with all of you! Sometimes life is really really hard and then sometimes is really really awesome. I think it makes both parts of life better if we are able to share our woes and excitements with our friends (which is where blogging fits in), so thanks again for being excited about my day with me!

Newborn's Conversation with God

I got this adorable poem from Renee's Blog (thanks Renee) I thought it was perfect for mother's day. It really captures what it means to be Mother, trusted with a little spirit from heaven.

I hope I will be able to help Lucy remember who her Heavenly Father is and how much he loves her as I was taught by my sweet mother. I am only starting to see how much our Heavenly Father loves us as I raise this sweet and loving baby girl. Sometimes I just don't think I can tell her I love her, or kiss her enough. I know we are this precious and much more to our Heavenly Father. Thank You Lucy for making me a Mother on my first Mother's Day. And A special Thank You Mother on this 23rd Mother's day you have celebrated, for teaching me how to be a good mother by your loving example. Sometimes when I feel overwhelmed at the task of Motherhood I look up to you and think, "If my Mom could do it, so can I." I really never realized the countless hours of love, care, worry and prayers that were put into making me the person I am today. Thank You for waking up for me when I was a baby, for keeping up with me when I was a toddler, for putting up with me while I was a teenager and now lifting me up as a Mother. You are truly the best Mother and Friend a girl could hope for! I can never thank you enough and dedicate this to you, My Angel Mother!

A baby asked God, 'They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?'

God said, 'Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you.'

The child further inquired, 'But tell me, here in heaven I don't have to do anything but sing and smile to be happy.'

God said, 'Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you. And you will feel your angel's love and be very happy.'

Again the child asked, 'And how am I going to be able to understand when people talk to me if I don't know the language?'

God said, 'Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will teach you how to speak.' 'And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?' God said, 'Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you how to pray.

''Who will protect me?' God said, 'Your angel will defend you even if it means risking its life.'
'But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore.'
God said, 'Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach you the way to come back to Me, even though I will always be next to you.'

At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, 'God, if I am to leave now, please tell me my angel's name.'
God said, 'You will simply call her, 'Mom.'

Grandpa's Funeral

April 26, 2008

Grandpa Russell's Funeral was a very touching and spiritual moment I am so glad I had the opportunity to be a part of. It was worth the crazy travelling (As mentioned before, We were in Spokane visiting and I flew back to Utah for the funeral and then back to Spokane for the duration of our vacation and then back to Utah, which becomes crazier when you add that I did it by myself with a baby and many layovers)!

At the end of the Service at the church my Grandma Anna stepped up and said that she wanted to bear her testimony even though she wasn't in the Program. She knew that there would never be such a great opportunity with all of her children there and many of her grandkids and great grandkids. What an inspiring and spiritual lady with the ability to listen to the Lord whenever she is prompted. My favorite part of her testimony was ( very paraphrased) "Don't feel sorry for Grandpa or me. He has moved on and is happy. We are sealed for time and all eternity and will be together again. Just do what you need to so that you can come to the Celestial Kingdom and be part of our great family forever." She has such a great optimism and love of the gospel and I am honored to be part of her posterity.

Here is a picture of Grandma Anna so you can visualize the wonderful woman I'm talking about. (Taken by my Uncle John Poppleton)


My Father sang "Danny Boy" at the grave, which I have known he would sing at my Grandpa's Funeral for many years. It was very touching to watch it actually happen and know that it was exactly what my Grandpa wanted.
I thought this was a very touching scene of my Father and His Brothers with their arms around each other.
I was touched by my Mother and Father, still holding hands as they walk.

Grandpa's Nephew's Son in Law holding Lucy at the viewing with the most classic look of displeasure imaginable. My uncle Johnny took this picture, meanwhile I was waiting to swoop in right after the photo. And then... One of my favorite moments happened: Lucy reached her arms out to me and called "Mama." She has mumbled it in passing before, but this was the first time she just looked at me and really meant that she needed me! It felt great after all these months of hearing "DADA." Since then she has began using it regularly when she wants me, which is very very precious to me.

One last touching memory I wanted to share: We visited my Grandpa for the last time during General Conference. When we were saying our goodbyes Grandpa was waving bye at Lucy and she waived Bye Bye (for the first time) to him. It took her another few weeks before ever doing it for anyone else. It was almost as if she was waiving goodbye because she knew she wouldn't see him again for a long time. That last conversation I had with my Grandpa was about him being so old and Lucy being so young and the circle of life. Grandpa's time is gone, but now it is our time. We must do everything that we can to live the best life possible. Love people, Serve people and treasure every the special moments as they come.

Icicles

Instead of complaining about the snow, like usual, I decided to be in a very positive mood and just be grateful that it would soon really be spring and that we got one more chance to enjoy the snow before it is gone for good!This is Lucy complaining about the snow, until I told her she had to be positive! (I love this expression!)

Saturday, the weather was beautiful, so I pruned the roses while Lucy played in her Pack n' Play that her Nanna got her! Contrast that day to:

Sunday, we awoke to a gorgeous an unexpected blanket of snow. It snowed all day! Every time I looked out the window it shocked me!

On the way to church I couldn't help singing:

"Spring had brought me such a nice surprise,
snow is falling right before my eyes!" (To the tune of Popcorn Popping)

Today it began to melt and vwalla:
I was very impressed by these icicles. I thought they were magnificent. I don't think the camera could capture how truly beautiful this whole icicle design was, but I tried. You will just have to use your imagination a little.
While examining these marvelous creations of nature, I was reminded of how beautiful the world really is. God is truly an artist!

The song in my heart today is "My Heavenly Father Loves Me"
which I will quote for your enjoyment:

"Whenever I hear the song of a bird
Or look at the blue, blue sky,
Whenever I feel the rain on my face
Or the wind as it rushes by,
Whenever I touch a velvet rose
Or walk by our lilac tree,
I'm glad that I live in this beautiful world
Heavenly Father created for me."

"He gave me my eyes that I might see
The color of butterfly wings.
He gave me my ears that I might hear
The magical sound of things.
He gave me my life, my mind, my heart:
I thank him reverently
For all his creations, of which I'm a part.
Yes, I know Heavenly Father loves me."

I took a little extra time to marvel at the world today. I love how Lucy listens to every noise she hears. The sound of birds has her so enthralled, while my weathered mind pretty much tunes them out. When Lucy feels the wind she always smiles. It is one of her favorite feelings. I wonder what she is thinking about when she feels it. Without her around, I would just as soon forget that it is there. It dawned on me that one of the reasons having children is part of the plan for happiness is because they make you so aware of the world and its wonders. They call your attention to the small things that they are noticing. You get to enjoy the wonderful new experiences they have with their eyes, ears, hands, and heart. This song above puts it so perfectly that we might "hear, The magical sound of things." To babies new sounds really are magical and if we listen closely, I believe we can also hear and feel how magical these small things in life are.(We saw this rainbow from our window last summer 2 days before Lucy was born and marveled)

Sometimes, I just get in such a rush to do everything I forget to look around and be still. I think we have been given the commandment to Be Still so that we might let that awe and wonder of this beautiful world, and all that Heavenly Father has done for us, overtake our spirits. One of my young women leaders, Paula Larsen, once said something about this that had a profound impact on me. She explained (I can't remember the exact wording, but something to this effect) that if the Lord had wanted to, she believed that he could have made the world black and white and we could still learn all the lessons we were put here on earth to learn, but he didn't. He made it in color. He made it in color that we might enjoy. That we might awe. That we might wonder. That we might imagine. That we might know that he is God when we look out upon all of his creations.

I would like to encourage everyone to take a little more time to be still.

As said is Psalm 46:10:

"Be still, and know that I am God."